A video game is not a pizza. You don't consume it once. You play it over a period of time, and if it's a good game with a good developer, they improve it over time. Stardock have shown themselves again and again to do an outstanding job of supporitng their games, fixing problems, improving gameplay and adding content.
However, if it's a pizza analogy you like: the Demigod release was more like, you ordered two pizzas for your living room LAN party. You've hosted LAN parties before, and you know how many people you need to feed. This time, though, 100 people show up. Then they start complaining that there's nothing to eat, and that there aren't enough network connections for all of them. Then the local newspaper comes out with a headline that says "Marshial Does Horrible Job Hosting LAN Party", subtitled "Starving players can't connect or play".
Yes, I know games are not as simple as ordering a pizza. My point was Demigod has unluckly failed to give one of the aspects fully at the start. The matter of consuming at once doesn't give an argument. Yeah, they will fix (fixed) it later on, I know, but that doesn't change the fact that everthing was not there from the start. I recall writing that its diffferent for a game because of patches and all and that complete game is hard to define. So I used pizza as a example, which I think 'complete' is easier to imagine, to point that it not something you don't usually allow. (I don't know why I chose pizza but probably caz I ordered it few days ago.)
In your case, I would have organized it so a fixed number of people will join, and have some extras just incase its not enough. There is no 'I've done this before so its going to be the same', it's more true for games becasue there are no sencond initial release for a same game. Preparation, estimation, or what ever you want to call is a MUST thing to do. 180k pirate access? was there really nothing you could do about that? (budget is not limitless so I can see there is limitation but, everyone is faced with it all the time) Still, I contradict myself a bit but I would complain if something like that happens but after all I would NEVER say that my resposibilities on it is 0%.
I'm not saying Stardock is all to blame but isn't it fair to say they have some responisbility on it too?