Theory:

Google capitulates to government demand for information LINK

Which in turn implies Google is in bed with the CIA LINK

Thus leading to the rumor the CIA has reactivated Operation Mockingbird and is using Google to implement it LINK

Anderson Cooper reactivated Operation Mockingbird in Egypt LINK

Anderson Cooper happens to be gay

Googles logo has the same colors as the gay pride rainbow

The gay pride rainbow happens to share the same colors as the Microsoft/Windows logo

Conclusion

Anderson Cooper and Bill Gates are lovers who are in bed with the CIA and secretly running Google in a plan for world domination.

The end result will be Lady Ga-Ga streamed into every home and office, the complete emulsification of all banded pirates and having them reprogrammed into more acceptable icons such as motorcycle cops and indians, ala Village People, and the complete pacification of the rest of the world except on Saturday Nights, because ..you know..they still want us to get our groove on.

Most theories are just kooks let out of the asylum.  But YOURS!  It has panache' and style!  I like it!

Well today is no better.... the red glow bouncing back off the mirror means I can't see the stubble... and shaving by touch has resulted in quite a few nicks

... which is some feat with an electric shaver.

Anyhow, mrs starkers seems to think that if I fess up to what I did after being so vehement, the red face might subside enough that paramedics down the shopping centre first aid room won't be rushing to get the oxygen mask on me next time.

First off, I need to explain that I was placed under extreme duress when very valid reasons were given as to why I should concede.

Well here goes nothing.... I bought myself a mobile/cell phone.

Now before you bastards go calling me a weakling woos or a turncoat on my own principles, I put up a determined resistance and employed various evasive manouvres before finally caving in. I mean, when I've made up my mind I stick to my guns and neither hell or high water with budge me... usually.  However some certain people know how to persuade me otherwise...

For example, mrs starkers was at the phone shop counter looking at the available options for me, and I decided that I needed to go to the toilet, where I hid for a while hoping she'd give up on the idea.  No such luck!   She got one of the security guards and told him that I might be loitereing in one of the centre's male toilet facilities and that he should return me to her immediately, which he did while giving me some rather peculiar looks.

When it was decided that I should have a basic $29.00 unit connected to Vodaphone, I threw a tantrum, stamped my feet and sobbed uncontollably fo about half an hour.   Hmmph, I figured the store clerk would call security on me for a second time and have me ejected, but again, no such luck.  She recognised that I was old school and was understanding of my fear of the new technology.  Shit, I even got down on the floor and performed several 360's on my shoulder, but I probably looked more like a disabled breakdancer with a nervous tic than a tantrum chucker, so I gave in and bought the fucken phone.

Okay, bullshit aside, I was convinced to get a mobile phone because we have been spending way too much calling Bianca down in Tassie and we wanted to reduce our communications costs to put OUR money to better use.... and unlimited text and voice using Vodaphone to Vodaphone will certainly do that. I have mine,Shaunna has hers and Bianca picks hers up on Monday when she returns from a camp.

Up until now, we have had to ring Bianca using our landline to ring her mobile because Telstra [our major telco] won't use the fully functional landline already present at her address because they didn't installt it.  No, they want her to spend $360 to put in 10 metres of cable to a property she neither owns or intends to remain at... and without Telstra's co-operation, none of the other telcos can provide her a service.

Also, my son and his partner are with Vodaphone, as are some rellies of Shaunna's, so it makes sense that we opt into the same network and plan to take advantage of almost unlimited contact.

So why do I need a Vodaphone mobile if Shaunna already has one?  Well we're not always together and if I need to remind her to pick up some bread or milk on the way home, I'm nor racking up the landline bill.  Also, if Shaunna is out and incommunicado for various reasons, and Bianca [or others] need to get in touch cheaply, there's now a second option,

Oh, and if anyone thinks I've abandoned my safety concens, I have taken precautions while using my new mobile.  First off, before I even use it, I don a protective wetsuit with a thermal reflection barrier and full-face mask.  Then I use a 4 metre stick when I need to push any buttons; and thirdly, I put it on speaker phone and stand on the opposite sidse of the room... to be sure, to be sure.

You lot mightn't place any credence on any of this cell phone antenna radiation doing queer shit to peoples brains, but I'm not taking any chances.

Couldn't resist, mate... too good to pass up. I actually think getting the Vodaphone was a good idea, and who knows when an emergency strikes, right?

If it was an Android? You'd never hear the end of it.

Naaah.... you've got the cell phone with the flashlight feature, right?

Yes there is: Laughter! Thank G-d for that, Cap'n.

Or large cell phone bills.... won't be able to dial, right? And speaking of laughter and bills...

Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spending the night together in a hotel room and Donald wanted to "enjoy some closeness" with Daisy.

The first thing Daisy asked was, "Do you have a condom?"

Donald frowned and said, "No."

Daisy told Donald that if he didn't get a condom, they could not have "closeness".

"Maybe they sell them at the front desk," she suggested.

So Donald went down to the lobby and asked the hotel clerk if they had condoms.

"Yes, we do," the clerk said and pulled a box out from under the counter and gave it to Donald.

The clerk asked, "Would you like me to put them on your bill?"

"Thit No!" Donald quacked, "I'll thuffocate!"

Well, I want to say Congrats to you Starkers.   You the man. The advantages greatly outweigh the negatory. The sky has lost it's red hue.  To bad, it was pretty.

And wondering how you know how many folks are lurking?   I've tried to look for it, to no avail??

I'm wondering what kind of collar he selected to go with that leash.  I'm betting studded or perhaps lace?

When I figure out how to use it.

So far, I've learned how to turn it on and answer a call.

It's quite simple.... you add up how many responses there are [which often are very few]  and guesstimate there's 6 million users across the SD forums.  Come the end of it, you figure out there's 10 or so people who responded.... leaving 6 million or so lurkers.

That ain't the half of it!  After the tantrum in the phone shop, hiding out in the dunny and the uncontrollable sobbing, I told this cop the story and tried to get hin to intervene in what I felt was spousal abuse, but he just laughed, called me a big girls blouse and dragged me by the ear back to the phone shop.... kicking and screaming into the 80's, as you so aptly put it.

Believe me, it was one of the most traumatic experiences of my life, having to buy a mobile phone.

It was horrendous, and to think, I'm on my last sedative now.

The question is, are you ready to try video games?

How about laserdisk?

Oh, and another reason you should NOT let your kids enter this doodle debacle is that Google is wanting a new logo.

Slimy bastards; your kid enters; does well; Google lays claim to the art; Google gets FREE logo they otherwise would have had to pay big bucks for through an agency.

See, told you they had a hidden agenda.... and what it amounts to is child exploitation; slave labour; doing shit on the sly and on the cheap.

And why do they want children rather than adults?

Simple!  Children are innocent and unpolluted, and therefore have creative juices that have not been conditioned or to conform to any discipline or genre.... and that's why Google wants them.  You see, while childrens art can be quite basic and even sometimes primitive, it is fresh and exciting, and Google doesn't want to be tarred with the same old brush.

So, here's what I think we should do.  Withdraw all children who have already been entered and prevent others from being signed up on the dotted line.  Then we encourage aging adult artists to apply for the job.  I say aging artists because they are more likely to be prone to forgetfulness and C.R.A.F.T. disease.... the idea being that it'll cost Google a friggin' fortune having to pay these folk by the hour to complete the logo.

The other thing, I think we should do is get the Artists Union in on this.  I mean, Google IS evil, and we wouldn't want these old folk to get exploited, now would we?  I think the other thing we should do is have these folk implanted with tracking devices., just in case they overhear something at Google HQ and Google decides to take them for a drive in the country to make them disappear.

No a piece of technology from the 80s.  It was the original DVDs about the size of an LP and would play movies (but you had to flip it in the middle).  VCRs killed them as they could record as well - plus you did not have to "change sides" in the middle of the movie.  A friend had one.  I never saw the use of it and passed it by.

I remember those days well.  Now if it is under 40 inches, it is not a TV, but a computer monitor!