Daily Dose of Weird and Whacky Headlines

from JoeUser Forums

"La. Governor Outraged Over Faulty Pumps"--headline, Associated Press, March 15

She should wear flats.  They are better for yoru feet anyway.

"Stray Cats Enter Home, Attack Woman, Boy"--headline, Associated Press, March 15

They should have stuck to singing.

"Fidel Castro Fit to Run in 2008, Official Says"--headline, FoxNews.com, March 16

Another democrat in the race?

"VA Nurse Lists Dead Patient as 'Stable' "--headline, News & Record (Greensboro, N.C.), March 15

"This just in!  Francisco Franco is Still Dead!"

"160,000-Year-Old Child Suggests Modern Humans Got Early Start"--headline, National Geographic News, March 14

That is one old child!  Maybe Ben Franklin was right?

"Will Gonzales Fall for Attorney Firings?"--headline, CBSNews.com, March 16

I heard the one in Michigan was a knockout.

"Anna Nicole Smith in Diary: I Hate Sex" --headline, Foxnews, March 23

What?????  With the number of guys claiming to be the father of her daughter??????

"Crook Is Newest Judge in Burlington County"--headline, Courier-Post (Cherry Hill, N.J.), March 19

Is this the new "Judged by his peers" trend?

"Sheriff's Office Recognized"--headline, Enquirer (Cincinnati), March 19

The one with the big star over the doorway.

"French Candidate Calls for China Boycott"--headline, Associated Press, March 21

Escargo to be served on Paper plates only.

"Foundry Silterra Ponders 65-nm Leap"--headline, EE Times, March 20

Should he get a running start?

"Pampers Are Not an Invention of the Devil"--headline, Times (London), March 21

I always thought it was what was inside the diaper that was the invention of the devil!

humor
12,709 views 14 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
"VA Nurse Lists Dead Patient as 'Stable' "--headline, News & Record (Greensboro, N.C.), March 15

Nurses notes:
-- respiratory rate, heart rate -- unchanged.
-- no voiced complaints
-- patient appears peaceful  
(almost everybody's chart has these comments)
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top

Nurses notes:
-- respiratory rate, heart rate -- unchanged.
-- no voiced complaints
-- patient appears peaceful

Yep!  Stable!

Ashes of the Singularity II
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
! Good ones Doc! I haven't read your good and funny stuff in a while!
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top

"VA Nurse Lists Dead Patient as 'Stable' "--headline, News & Record (Greensboro, N.C.), March 15

"This just in!  Francisco Franco is Still Dead!"

"160,000-Year-Old Child Suggests Modern Humans Got Early Start"--headline, National Geographic News, March 14

That is one old child!  Maybe Ben Franklin was right?

"Pampers Are Not an Invention of the Devil"--headline, Times (London), March 21

I always thought it was what was inside the diaper that was the invention of the devil!

!!

Oh ya!!

Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
"Stray Cats Enter Home, Attack Woman, Boy"

On SNL's Weekend Update they said, "In Nebraska, 2 stray cats entered a house and attacked a woman .... while Brian Setzer waited in the car."
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top

Good ones Doc! I haven't read your good and funny stuff in a while!

I thought you might need a laugh.  Glad I could help.

Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top

On SNL's Weekend Update they said, "In Nebraska, 2 stray cats entered a house and attacked a woman .... while Brian Setzer waited in the car."

Sorry I missed that one.

Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top

Oh ya!!

I was wondering who would get the Franciso Franco one.

Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
I always thought it was what was inside the diaper that was the invention of the devil!


Heh, heh.

Good set as always, Doc.

~Zoo
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
"Pampers Are Not an Invention of the Devil"--headline, Times (London), March 21


This one just left me scratching my head and thinking "Huh?"
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
"Pampers Are Not an Invention of the Devil"--headline, Times (London), March 21

This one just left me scratching my head and thinking "Huh?"

It is an urban legend regarding the parent company. Scroll down to Proctor and GambleWWW Link
Still makes you want to scratch your head though.
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
This one just left me scratching my head and thinking "Huh?"


I think it was related to that Amway/Proctor and Gambol suit where some Amway reps were contending the P&G symbol represented the devil.
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
Good set as always, Doc.


Thanks Zoo!
Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
It is an urban legend regarding the parent company. Scroll down to Proctor and GambleWWW Link
Still makes you want to scratch your head though.


Should have read all the responses before repeating yours. Yep!