if love is a red dress ...

... hang me in rags

http://www.loserturdmafia.com/
from JoeUser Forums



we meet


i
want
to
bite
you i
want you
to bite me back i
want us
to
go on biting each other until we stop feeling so damned hungry all the time i
want to break your bedroom window with a
brick
i hope it
hits
you
while you sleep



we fall in love


change
nothing
don’t
go
outside any
more ‘cause you’re my
hero but they will just tell you you’re too hard for
me or
something they like to
do that stuff they'd
rather it made
sense
to them but it won’t ever so don’t you listen ok



we run away together


let’s run
away
we’ll go somewhere warm we
can make stuff up i'll be gladys you'll be frank you can wear a panama we'll
write lovenotes in french and
play chess and
i won't
even cry
if
you
win
art
442 views 12 replies
Reply #1 from Stardock Forums Top
Blah.








C'mon. Don't say you didn't see that coming, after your request on "if love is a blue dress."
Reply #2 from Stardock Forums Top
Seriously though, I had read this earlier, pre-"blue dress." I just didn't have anything to say. I don't know what to say to the poetry around here. I haven't commented on poetry since I was Critic in Residence of a writers' group ages ago. That was a whole different kind of commenting; critiquing really. Here -- I just don't really have anything to say. Sorry.
Siege of Centauri
Reply #3 from Stardock Forums Top
Blah. C'mon. Don't say you didn't see that coming, after your request on "if love is a blue dress


gene, i was laughing before i even opened the comment.


I haven't commented on poetry since I was Critic in Residence of a writers' group ages ago. That was a whole different kind of commenting; critiquing really. Here -- I just don't really have anything to say. Sorry.


you could just say "i hated it". no, it's ok. i'm very glad to know you read it anyway. i often have the same problem with poetry, in that i find it difficult to comment on something so personal. i'm sorry i pressured you, gene, hehe. are you ok ?

"still laughing"
mig XX
Reply #4 from Stardock Forums Top
i was laughing before i even opened the comment.


That's okay. I'm used to women bursting out laughing before I even open my mouth....


are you ok ?


Just a little winded. I'll recover.
Reply #5 from Stardock Forums Top
i won't
even cry
if
you
win


The panama wearer might.

Too often, when we win, we break a heart (who's heart does not necessarily matter); when we accomplish the ends of our stories, we always have to add a footnote of tragedy. I think this time you might have forgotten to include it for them.

As always, a lamp lit delight. (Whatever the hell that means. It always happens to be dark when i read your vintage, hence the lamp nonsense. Anyway, you always keep me up far beyond my already disgustingly liberal bedtime)

Marco XX
Reply #6 from Stardock Forums Top
Would you rather have critical comments or no comment?

~Sarah
Reply #7 from Stardock Forums Top
That's okay. I'm used to women bursting out laughing before I even open my mouth....


well. i will choose to take that to mean that women are so overcome by the sheer magnitude of your presence that they erupt into helpless nervous giggling as a purely defensive mechanism against the raw animal sexuality oozing from your every pore.

no ?. me neither. i think it's my hair they're laughing at actually.


Just a little winded. I'll recover


i do hope so gene. as you know, i have come to depend on you to unscramble my head hehe


The panama wearer might.


marco, but of course


when we accomplish the ends of our stories, we always have to add a footnote of tragedy. I think this time you might have forgotten to include it for them


nope. this time i wouldn't fuck it up. i wouldn't. i wouldn't !


Would you rather have critical comments or no comment? ~Sarah


that's a very good point, sarah, i'm glad you asked. it's a double edged sword, i guess. as you know, poetry feels very personal, so it's not like a "normal" blog in which you can offer input or an opinion. also, some poetry can make you feel awful when you read it, and even though that may have been the authors' intention, it's easier to walk away that to risk saying so and maybe causing offence. yet, when you write a poem, you do actually want to know what others think - it's a real joy to have somebody "get" you in that way.

so, i'd say that the answer would be that i would rather have "critical" comments provided they take the form of relevance to the work somehow, and not some "your grammer is wrong" type of thing. ugh. does that makes sense ?. hehe

what i think i'm trying to say is that as far as poetry is concerned, most of the bloggers on ju would prefer ANY comment at all. it doesn't have to be a full dissection (but those are cool), even a quick "this made me think" or even a shared experience you can relate it to (good or bad) is great.

sarah, i have to shut up now. you have inspired me to write a blog on this and i have to go DO it. thanks for your very insightful comment

mig XX
Reply #8 from Stardock Forums Top
well. i will choose to take that to mean that women are so overcome by the sheer magnitude of your presence that they erupt into helpless nervous giggling as a purely defensive mechanism against the raw animal sexuality oozing from your every pore.


Yeah, that one, how'd you know?

Nah... The "laugh before I even open my mouth" line was said soley for the sake of the joke. I'm shameless.

When women are overwhelmed by the "sheer magnitude of (my) presence" and "the raw animal sexuality oozing from (my) every pore" they tend to pause like does in headlights, staring pop-eyed and slack-jawed.
Reply #9 from Stardock Forums Top
I'm happy that I could inspire you to write a blog about it. It was a very good one at that.

so, i'd say that the answer would be that i would rather have "critical" comments provided they take the form of relevance to the work somehow, and not some "your grammer is wrong" type of thing. ugh. does that makes sense ?. hehe


It's spelled grammar, not grammer.

I'm so sorry, I just had too. Please forgive me.

~Sarah
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
When women are overwhelmed by the "sheer magnitude of (my) presence" and "the raw animal sexuality oozing from (my) every pore" they tend to pause like does in headlights, staring pop-eyed and slack-jawed


yes. i am certain that this is what i myself would do

I'm happy that I could inspire you to write a blog about it. It was a very good one at that


thanks sarah


It's spelled grammar, not grammer


hehe sarah i saw that too. i changed it before it hit the blog, though. this is what we call true irony, no ?


mig XX
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
changenothingdon’tgooutside anymore ‘cause you’re myhero but they will just tell you you’re too hard forme or something they like todo that stuff they'drather it madesenseto them but it won’t ever so don’t you listen ok


This struck a huge cord with me mig, I "feel" it
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top


This struck a huge cord with me mig, I "feel" it


thankyou, macky !!!!.


(i am so grateful that i am barely containing a torrent of pathetic, slavering gratitude).

i might just do this instead: ... yeah,ok that hurts my fingers heh

*does the happy dance*


mig XXXXXXXX