Banned for thinking that my intellectual meanderings are the creation of white-coated misfits who should be inmates rather than running the asylum Mondays to Fridays.

On the weekends normalcy returns when the inmates take over.

How do I know?  Your former cellmate told me.  

Banned for cellular meanderings in between seasons.

banned for seasonal meanderings

Banned for talking the talk and walking the walk out of season and meandering on and on about the consequences of pigeons mating in your roof in season and out.

Also banned for interseasonal mating all year 'round.

banned for thinking a year is round

Banned for thinking a year is not as long as it is wide.... and for eternally going for a square meal when a pancake [round] is a great alternative to genetically modified baked beans.

Banned for being baked without the wake.

Banned for being awake at the bake, only to discover the cake was a fake.

Banned for wax figures.

banned for waning into your figure

Banned for failing to figure it out ... not seeing the waning under-the-counter deal that could've saved you a bundle on those hard to find, thus more expensive, extra small rubber gloves, you need when yer missus says "do the dishes, otherwise there's no nooky for you tonight".

banned for not realizing that I make the kids do the dishes

Banned for child slave labour.... at least pay the poor li'l tykes so they can afford to move out sooner rather than later and escape having to work in a non-union kitchen.

Banned 'cause the IDIC doesn't apply.

banned for usage of acronyms 

Banned for having an acronym on the tip of your tongue and not knowing how to spit it out.

banned for wanting a saliva covered series of letters with hidden meanings

Banned for hidden meanings, period.  Just BANNED!!!!!

BANNED!!! 'cause spamming am not nice!

banned for banning processed canned meat

Banned for processing your meat and putting it in a can.

banned for not canning the corn

Banned for dispersing the corn from the cob and calling it sweet.  Oi, get yer priorities right, yer wife's sweet

banned for hagging my cob

Banned for you shouldn't let your cob hang out, leaving it prone to injury and hagging by old crones.