Music Review: Ellie Goulding "Explosions"

Ellie Goulding

Explosions

Album: Halycon

Year: 2013

          Ellie Goulding can no longer lead a passive life with her boyfriend in the mystical               “Explosions.”

           Celestial “oh’s” and reserved strings open the single, setting a revelatory tone.  His legs shook as she told him her secrets. Without looking at her, he told her couldn’t handle it. It was too soon. She said ok, she would stop. She couldn’t full him with trust or a sense of peace. She left him rattled. After she was late to his house, his eyes flashed and in a stern voice, wanted to know where she was. She responded and told him traffic. There was an accident on the way to his house. He told her she should’ve called and went to get his keys. She gave him a soft smile and apologized. She added that it was kind of him to be worried. He tells her she’s making too much of what he said. She remembers he was a man who didn’t flinch at her touch. Somehow, she has a become of symbol of an half-hearted effort, a series of failures she can’t control. When she wasn’t looking, he knocked her off her pedestal  and defaced her. It was clear then he didn’t love her. (“You trembled like you'd seen a ghost/And I gave in/I lack the things you need the most, you said where have you been/You wasted all that sweetness to run and hide/I wonder why/I remind you of the days you poured your heart into/But you never tried/I've fallen from grace/Took a blow to my face/I've loved and I've lost/I've loved and I've lost.”)

          In the chorus, for her love meant allowing herself to be vulnerable and the excitement it brings once it’s been penetrated. It makes a closed love much harder to accept. (“Explosions on the day you wake up/Needing somebody and you've learned/It's okay to be afraid/But it will never be the same/It will never be the same.”)

            There were so many things she wanted to say to him. It was as though he glued an invisible mask on her face to prevent her from showing any emotion. Then he could continue the relationship on his terms without giving her any say. She didn’t know if she was doing anything wrong. For awhile, she couldn’t believe in herself, thinking he was the best she could get. There were some good days, though. He would include her in his interests. The wait for the next good day, though, had an undetermined time. When he was away, she realized she was still the same person she was before she met him. (“You left my soul bleeding in the dark/So you could be king/The rules you set are still untold to me and I lost my faith in everything/The nights you could cope, your intentions were gold/But the mountains will shake/I need to know I can still make.”)

            The chorus is sung again.

            In the bridge, a phone call in the middle of the night startled her. On the other end, she heard breathing. She said her ex-boyfriend’s name and he hung up. It was then she knew that his dream didn’t work out. She told him to think it through and if sacrificing the relationship was worth it. He said it was. She tried to save him. She can’t believe she’s watching him crumble. She wanted him to open up to her but did not wish for his destruction. She hopes the experience changes him for the better and he is able to grow up from it. Maybe then they could be a couple again. (“And as the floods move in/And your body starts to sink/I was the last thing on your mind/I know you better than you think/Because it's simple darling, I gave you a warning/Now everything you own is falling from the sky in pieces/So watch them fall with you, in slow motion/I pray that you will find peace of mind/And I'll find you another time/I'll love you, another time.”)

         The chorus is sung again to end the single.

        Goulding’s tranquil vocals have found a safe place. She has spent enough time away from him to know he was damaging her. As he pleads for her, she can’t let herself feel too deeply. Otherwise, she’ll land where she tried so hard to escape.

          The  staid  “Explosions” effectively externalizes the complex emotional combination of indifference and protecting without inclination to do anything. In other words, great job!