SWIWNN WIF
She Whom I Will Not Name: Winter Into Fall
from 
JoeUser Forums
JoeUser Forums
First up, I decided I didn't like using the acronym WILMA, so I'll be using SWIWNN instead. At least until I decide I don't like that one either. It stands for She Whom I Will Not Name, which means I'll have to change it should I ever name her 
But on with the story.
Winter was ending and I knew their marriage was doing poorly and was trying to help. By help I mean being someone that would listen to what either of them had to say, about anything. He didn't take me up on talking, at least about nongame things, at least with any regularity. A few times we would talk a small amount, but that was usually because of something she had done to encourage him. Like one day er, I'm getting ahead of myself here.
As the winter of 2000 was winding down I would spend a fair sized amount of time talking to her, mostly online, but talking all the same. I think I'll mention now that all timeframes are best remembered, I have a feeling I'll be getting some details off in hindsight, but they will hopefully be only minor ones. Anyways, she decided to quit her job so that she could spend more time working on her marriage. Good idea, yeah and stuff. They went to a marriage counselour a few times, but unfortunatly it didn't seem to be enough.
So the snow is off the ground, at least most of it, and she's out of work. As we had talked one of us (her I think but it's not important who) said she should go running, get out and exercise some. But there was the whole motivation thing, so we decided to run together, then we could motivate each other. She had a route around town that was about three miles, and while we weren't up to running it at first we did work up to it and by the end of the summer we were running the whole route, almost every day.
Which started the pattern that would last for the rest of the summer. We'd get up in the morning (at our respective homes) chat for a bit while she is helping her husband get ready for work, and then once he had left, I'd bike the mile or so over to their place. Then we would chat for a little while before heading out for our walk/jog/run/whatever it ended up being that day. We'd get back and sit around talking until lunch, then talk some more. Often doing some household chores while talking, vacuuming, cleaning showers, stuff like that. Then a little after four I'd head home, her husband would get home around five, and we'd meet up in game (Asheron's Call) around seven. Play until midnightish, then he would usually go to sleep. Sometimes she and I would stay up chatting more, other times we would go to bed as well. Then in the morning we would repeat.
And that was the daily pattern for oh, four months or so. At the start of it the last thing on my mind was having an affair, or even loving her, I thought that if she had someone to talk to it would help her, and helping her was my only interest. But sometime during the running I realized I had fallen in love with her. After some serious thinking I decided to tell her I loved her, although it didn't really change anything. Our relationship was very much nonphysical (at least nonphysical together, running is rather physical), in fact I don't think we had even shook hands at that point. But all the same, we were becoming very close with all the time we spent together.
More often then not, she would end up crying as we talked, with me sitting next to her and so wanting to hold her in an attempt to comfort her. But yet I never could, and we both knew it and it was at her request. She felt that any physical contact would lead to things going where they shouldn't, and while I didn't completely agree, I yielded to her experience and wishes.
There were a few events during this time that really stand out in my mind. She liked making cookies, and one night we were making molasses cookies in the kitchen, while her husband was watching tv in the other room. Well with that batch of cookies I was the assistant and she was the one to get her hands dirty, and with the molasses dirty they got. So at the end she had these filthy cookie dough covered hands. And one of us (her I think) suggested I should lick her fingers clean. I (and I'm very certain she as well) realized where that was headed before we did anything. But the thought was there...
Another night we were all playing the game together and managed to get ourselves slaughtered by big scary monsters (banderlings to be precise). Well I was upset by it, I just don't like dying, so the three of us went out for icecream. Was great fun, we met up in the middle of town then walked to the icecream shop. Had our icecream then walked back to their place before I went home.
Then ther was the night I was there until about 2 in the morning. Don't remember why I was there that late, but we decided it was too late for me to bike home, so I slept on the couch. They went to bed in their bed, or that was the plan. Sometime later she came out and slept on the floor next to the couch. And in the morning he came out and asked if we had enjoyed sleeping together. Was a very strange situation, he seemed a little upset, but not really. More sarcastic then anything else.
Which I think shows how things were in their marriage, even with me right there he wouldn't acknowledge there was really anything wrong. In fact the opposite more often then not, he thanked me for spending time with her and talking to her. On the one hand he seemed completly oblivious to how I was feeling towards her and how she seemed to be starting to feel towards me, but on the other hand, he didn't seem to care in the least what we did together. Or maybe he was just so into the game. From what I could tell his day consisted of sleep, work (where he could play the game), the game at home, and somewhere in there eating some food. Have I mentioned MMORPG's are evil?
Fourth of July that year was another interesting time, he invited me down to his parents place for a party. They went to college together and they got together with some friends each fourth of july. So I joined them, met some people, had a nice time. Went swimming, played with seaweed, burnt things, all sorts of fun stuff. It was an overnight party too, all the guests slept on the floor in one room. I think there were seven of us piled in there. You get one guess who I slept next to.
Anyways, things went on as they did for the summer, but towards the start of fall they started changing again (as things tend to do). She had gotten a job (which she is actually at as I type this) and was working again. But if anything it seemed to make her marriage even worse. Many a night she would either come over to my house to play the piano, or meet me at church where I would unlock it so she could do the same. And one night shortly before she moved out she spent the night with me. That night was bizarre in so many ways.
She came over hmm, not exactly sure, but it wasn't really dark out yet. She played the piano alot, walked around in circles some, and I did get her to eat dinner, which was good (since I don't think she had lunch of breakfast that day). I spent most of that time just being there, so that she would have someone to talk to. But that night was also the time I hinted at above when I talked to him about things. He was running around in game, and I left myself logged on and sitting in a corner so I could talk to him. And from that talk I concluded that he did love her, but he didn't see a problem and was sure she just needed time to vent. He could have been right, neither of them are speaking to me now so for all I know they could have gotten back together. But I very much doubt it. Anyways, she spent the night, in my sisters bed, and then was off in the morning.
That's enough for now, next time I'll tell about moving her into her own place and where things went from there...
But on with the story.Winter was ending and I knew their marriage was doing poorly and was trying to help. By help I mean being someone that would listen to what either of them had to say, about anything. He didn't take me up on talking, at least about nongame things, at least with any regularity. A few times we would talk a small amount, but that was usually because of something she had done to encourage him. Like one day er, I'm getting ahead of myself here.
As the winter of 2000 was winding down I would spend a fair sized amount of time talking to her, mostly online, but talking all the same. I think I'll mention now that all timeframes are best remembered, I have a feeling I'll be getting some details off in hindsight, but they will hopefully be only minor ones. Anyways, she decided to quit her job so that she could spend more time working on her marriage. Good idea, yeah and stuff. They went to a marriage counselour a few times, but unfortunatly it didn't seem to be enough.
So the snow is off the ground, at least most of it, and she's out of work. As we had talked one of us (her I think but it's not important who) said she should go running, get out and exercise some. But there was the whole motivation thing, so we decided to run together, then we could motivate each other. She had a route around town that was about three miles, and while we weren't up to running it at first we did work up to it and by the end of the summer we were running the whole route, almost every day.
Which started the pattern that would last for the rest of the summer. We'd get up in the morning (at our respective homes) chat for a bit while she is helping her husband get ready for work, and then once he had left, I'd bike the mile or so over to their place. Then we would chat for a little while before heading out for our walk/jog/run/whatever it ended up being that day. We'd get back and sit around talking until lunch, then talk some more. Often doing some household chores while talking, vacuuming, cleaning showers, stuff like that. Then a little after four I'd head home, her husband would get home around five, and we'd meet up in game (Asheron's Call) around seven. Play until midnightish, then he would usually go to sleep. Sometimes she and I would stay up chatting more, other times we would go to bed as well. Then in the morning we would repeat.
And that was the daily pattern for oh, four months or so. At the start of it the last thing on my mind was having an affair, or even loving her, I thought that if she had someone to talk to it would help her, and helping her was my only interest. But sometime during the running I realized I had fallen in love with her. After some serious thinking I decided to tell her I loved her, although it didn't really change anything. Our relationship was very much nonphysical (at least nonphysical together, running is rather physical), in fact I don't think we had even shook hands at that point. But all the same, we were becoming very close with all the time we spent together.
More often then not, she would end up crying as we talked, with me sitting next to her and so wanting to hold her in an attempt to comfort her. But yet I never could, and we both knew it and it was at her request. She felt that any physical contact would lead to things going where they shouldn't, and while I didn't completely agree, I yielded to her experience and wishes.
There were a few events during this time that really stand out in my mind. She liked making cookies, and one night we were making molasses cookies in the kitchen, while her husband was watching tv in the other room. Well with that batch of cookies I was the assistant and she was the one to get her hands dirty, and with the molasses dirty they got. So at the end she had these filthy cookie dough covered hands. And one of us (her I think) suggested I should lick her fingers clean. I (and I'm very certain she as well) realized where that was headed before we did anything. But the thought was there...
Another night we were all playing the game together and managed to get ourselves slaughtered by big scary monsters (banderlings to be precise). Well I was upset by it, I just don't like dying, so the three of us went out for icecream. Was great fun, we met up in the middle of town then walked to the icecream shop. Had our icecream then walked back to their place before I went home.
Then ther was the night I was there until about 2 in the morning. Don't remember why I was there that late, but we decided it was too late for me to bike home, so I slept on the couch. They went to bed in their bed, or that was the plan. Sometime later she came out and slept on the floor next to the couch. And in the morning he came out and asked if we had enjoyed sleeping together. Was a very strange situation, he seemed a little upset, but not really. More sarcastic then anything else.
Which I think shows how things were in their marriage, even with me right there he wouldn't acknowledge there was really anything wrong. In fact the opposite more often then not, he thanked me for spending time with her and talking to her. On the one hand he seemed completly oblivious to how I was feeling towards her and how she seemed to be starting to feel towards me, but on the other hand, he didn't seem to care in the least what we did together. Or maybe he was just so into the game. From what I could tell his day consisted of sleep, work (where he could play the game), the game at home, and somewhere in there eating some food. Have I mentioned MMORPG's are evil?
Fourth of July that year was another interesting time, he invited me down to his parents place for a party. They went to college together and they got together with some friends each fourth of july. So I joined them, met some people, had a nice time. Went swimming, played with seaweed, burnt things, all sorts of fun stuff. It was an overnight party too, all the guests slept on the floor in one room. I think there were seven of us piled in there. You get one guess who I slept next to.
Anyways, things went on as they did for the summer, but towards the start of fall they started changing again (as things tend to do). She had gotten a job (which she is actually at as I type this) and was working again. But if anything it seemed to make her marriage even worse. Many a night she would either come over to my house to play the piano, or meet me at church where I would unlock it so she could do the same. And one night shortly before she moved out she spent the night with me. That night was bizarre in so many ways.
She came over hmm, not exactly sure, but it wasn't really dark out yet. She played the piano alot, walked around in circles some, and I did get her to eat dinner, which was good (since I don't think she had lunch of breakfast that day). I spent most of that time just being there, so that she would have someone to talk to. But that night was also the time I hinted at above when I talked to him about things. He was running around in game, and I left myself logged on and sitting in a corner so I could talk to him. And from that talk I concluded that he did love her, but he didn't see a problem and was sure she just needed time to vent. He could have been right, neither of them are speaking to me now so for all I know they could have gotten back together. But I very much doubt it. Anyways, she spent the night, in my sisters bed, and then was off in the morning.
That's enough for now, next time I'll tell about moving her into her own place and where things went from there...
