Does it show?

Did what show?

And is it even legal... to whip it out in public like that and startle little old ladies who probably haven't seen one so close and personal since they were schoolgirls learning to knit???

Yes.  Probably while they were knitting package warmers.  Measurements, weight, all necessary info you know? 

Do they fit snugly or do you have to resize them in batches?

Well, they stretch surprisingly well.  And, are available with battery operated warmers. How many should I order?

Do you have six skronks, nine ubishes and thirteen iggydorks? Cause if you do you're one up on me.

Do they reach the knees?  Cuz that's what's in stock right now!

Is there any chance they'll get some in stock with peek-a-boo holes for extra ventilation for those humid Summer nights?

Honey, we can have a hole in one,{edible} or peek-a-boo holes,{see through} delivered to anywhereville, Today!

How many?

Starkers will take the edible ones cause isn't his sweet tooth beggin' for more?

If I happened to tell you what my 'sweet tooth' is really begging for, would you be shocked and am I likely to get sin binned for a while??

Sin-binned probably not but dontcha think this one will be more convincing?

Just one thing!  Could you afford to have the hammer replaced after it was used to dong me on the noggin???

Maybe you could sell it on E Bay?

Will it fetch a good price? Is the dent on the head too much? Should I use duck tape to fix the handle? Questions question?

Duct tape. The silver kind?  Not for the dent on the head.

If you sold a hammer on ebay, would you push your luck and try to sell a left-handed mallet?

No. Duck tape, the silver kind?

Will a reverse round flat-head left-handed screwdriver do instead?

Vodka and orange maybe?  

What, no Tequila?

Tequila sunrise.       Anyone else want the worm? 

What, you don't like the worm?

Is it all squiggly and stuff?

Does it sound like I have a taker?

Is there a prize for swallowing the worm?