banned for plumbing the depths of depravity in the windy city

Banned for making the city so windy with leaky plumbing and fishing the depths of depravity out of the well.

Banned for giving away all the credit.

Banned for taking credit at a discount.

Banned for crediting the discount to a cut-price store.

Banned for cutting prices and pocketing the leftovers.

Banned for pocketing leftovers from the dinner table... the soup was definitely not a good idea.  Putting that in your back pocket [the front ones were full of bread rolls] makes it look like you had an accident in your pants.

banned for overly long bans

Banned for underly short bans with undertones that hit below the belt and other places.

Banned just cause banning is the right thing to do.

Banning from the left.

banned for political positioning

Banned for trying to stir up the blue donkeys and red elephants.

Banned for hee haw and peanuts.

Banned for watching Hee Haw and eating peanuts.

Banned for teasing the animals at the zoo by eating peanuts in front of them and not sharing.

Banned for sharing that with us.

Banned for not specifying who 'us' are and concealing the postal addresses so's I can't send the bills.

Banned for using a plate full of tracking cookies to obtain our addresses just so you could send us the bill.

Banned for hogging a plateful of cookies to yourself but sending the bill to Uvah.

banned for poor billing skills

Banned for taking a duck to a restaurant so you could put your food on his bill.

banned for being with a platypus 

Banned for plaiting your puss and getting beat on by your wife for animal cruelty.

Banned for thinking I'll settle for cheap stuff. If you send me the bill make sure the bucks come with it including interest.