mrs_starkers

mrs_starkers

Joined Member # 2585047
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Reply to Joke Central in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

A drunk is sitting in a bar. There is a very buxom blonde a few seats down from him with breasts size 44DD'S. A fellow at the end of the bar calls for a beer. The bartender fills the mug and slides it down the bar. It hits the lady's breasts and spills all over them. The bartender goes over, retrieves the mug and licks the beer off of her breasts. This happens a couple more times. The next time, the drunk jumps up and starts to lick

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[quote]If people like my stuff.....fantastic. If they don't.....well then.....[/quote] I have to agree with you Island Dog on your post #25, it just makes me want to work harder to achieve my goal at making something that people will like, it has taken me ages to even have two of my wallpapers on the main page and at the moment I am a very happy lady.

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Reply to Joke Central in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

His First Exam A man went into the proctologist's office for his first exam. The doctor told him to have a seat in the examination room and that he would be with him in just a few minutes. Well, when the man sat down in the examination room, he noticed that there were three items on a stand next to the doctor's desk: a tube of K-Y jelly, a rubber glove, and a beer. When the doctor came in, the man said, "Look Doc, this is my first

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Reply to Joke Central in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

Egg Donor One day, while Sue was cleaning under the bed, she found a small box. Curious, she opened it and found 3 eggs and 10,000 dollars. A little bit suspicious, she confronted her husband of twenty years about it. "Oh, that," Frank said. "Every time I cheated on you, I put an egg in this box." Sue was a bit unhappy about this, but figured that 3 affairs over twenty years wasn't so bad. "But what about the 10,000 dollars?" <br/

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Reply to Joke Central in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

A Rather Confident Man A rather confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?" "No", he replies, "I just bought this state-of-the-art watch and I was just testing it." The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?" "It use

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Reply to Joke Central in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

A drunk goes into a bar. He is very, very drunk - can hardly stand up. He slurs his way up to the bar and says: "Hey, bartender! Gimme a martini!" "No, no," says the bartender. "You've had too much already." The drunk spies a dart board behind the bar. "Tell you what," he says. "If I can throw three bull's eyes with that dart set would you let me have the drink?" "Sure," says the bartender, thinking the guy would leave after the little game. He hands

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Reply to Joke Central in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

EVER WONDER... Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why "abbreviated" is such a long word? Why doctors call what they do "practice"? Why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows 98? Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons? Why the man

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Reply to Joke Central in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

A truck driver, hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers, stops for a beer. As he approaches the bar, he sees a big sign on the door that says, "COMPUTER NERDS NOT ALLOWED - ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!" He enters and sits down. The bartender comes over to him, sniffs, and says that he smells kind of nerdy. He then asks him what he does for a living. The truck driver explains to him that he drives a truck, and the smell is just from the computers he is hauling. The bartender serves him a

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Reply to Joke Central in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

try this for size...... A man goes to his physician and is shocked to find that he has been replaced by a super-computer. The computer asks him his ailments and the man says he has a sore elbow. A drawer pops out and he is asked to urinate in it. After a few bleeps and flashing lights the computer decides he has tennis elbow. The man is annoyed and decides to get one over on this machine so he asks his wife for a urine sample. He then mixes this with urine from his dog and his

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