meanwhile, deep in aussie space, A group of zombies suddenly materializes.

UHHHHHHH WE ARE THE CANADIANS UHHHHHHH YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED UHHHHHHHHHH RESISTANCE IS FUTILE UHHHHHHHHHH JOIN THE COMMONWEALTH OF FORMER BRITISH COLNIES...


NOOOOOO EVERYONE GET OUT OF HERE. DON'T BE A FOOL KANGAROO JACK GET OUT!!! NOW. WE DON'T HAVE THE HOCKEY TAPE.

The Zombies overrun the place.

BWAHAHAHAHHAAH TOLD YA IT WOULD WORK MATEYS, NOW LETS TAKE IT ALL!!!!!!!!!!!! First we'll leave some of this medical tape behind. HEHE.

Similar incidents happen at other breweries and wineries simultaneously.

The Pirates leave some of the tape behind along with hockey sticks, and pucks, and a few ice skates. Fill up their ships, and head back to the Survey ship of doom with the new booty. Over heard on Aussie tele. WE WILL CRUSH THE CANADIAN MENACE WHEREEVER IT LIES!!! THIS WE VOW AS ANZAC'S.

Teeheehee. Worked like a charm. Pontius heads onto his weekend pass for real comforted by new premium Aussie swill and it's delivery back to the Doom for the crew.

Blast those undead - not only do they try and steal our beer, but they don't even keep a thread going so we can nail the bastards!!
That's it - power up the BattleCruiser Waltzing Matilda - we're heading NORTH!!!

meanwhile, at the Euro-alliance bunker, a mysterious device activates playing Kraftwork's Tour De France.

THE TOUR!!! WE'RE MISSING IT......(the euro's all rush out of the bunker.


teehee it worked. Load up the beer, Champaign (ooops sparkling wine) and all the rest of the booze. Leave that. Ok boys it's loaded. Should we leave our call sign or evidence implicating the Canadians..... Right lets tp the place with medical gauze!!!!........ Ok boys hehe we're out of here. Say I hear Lance took the lead. Wooohooo.

Meanwhile, after the pirates are gone, a lone Euro-Alliance member comes back to the bunker. "I can't believe those idiots forgot the booze.....Now I'm gonna miss Armstrong. What's this? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! It's the undead menace!!!

The MWC fleet was stuck. They were afraid to move agaist the Doom because the Canadian Ghost Ship is undetectable on sensors and in the way. The pride of the MWC could not be held at bay forever, they decided. MWC Strategic Missile Command hatched a cunning plan: Use the guided missile cruiser MWS Nebraska as bait. The cruiser would fly out way, way in front of the main fleet in order to attract the ship of the undead to the living flesh close by. Once in sight of the ghost ship, Missile Command would launch a devastating strike package toward the Nebraska. The Nebraska would take over the telemetry of the missiles at the last second and guide them into the ghost ship. Meanwhile, reinforcements would join the main fleet to help in the breakout once the missiles hit home. Operation Gates of Death begins.

The Nebraska is found by the ghost ship soon enough. At full stop, the Nebraska was waiting for this. Quick confirmation was radioed to MWC Command. The package was on its way, but the Nebraska would be on its own for several long hours while the missiles flew through hyperspace. It was time to play a deadly game of cat and mouse with the ghost ship until the strike package was in range of the Nebraska's control systems. They would have to stay one step ahead of the mystical fog around the ship or be engulfed and lose their bearings and all sensors.

Meanwhile, on the Doom, Gerakken finally primes his beloved scraper/painter robots for their first ship-wide assignment. The Doom has a special holographic field generator to disguise its colors in port, but in open space, the ship is painted entirely blood red with a set of white skull and crossbones prominently overlaying a huge part of the middle on both sides of the ship. The Yor-based robots are set free on the port side once damaged in the last run in with the Canadian Ghost Ship.

Gerakken checks on the robots every few minutes for the next hour. They have dutifully scraped and disinfected the entire port side. The chain of painter robots quickly amble to the bow on the port side and start laying down a blood red base coat of paint. All seems well. The white skull and crossbones is overlayed next onto the port side. Very, very nice so far. The faster scraper robots have already processed almost the entire ship. After nearly 4 hours of occasional observation, Gerakken moves on to another task off of the Doom, confident his invention will finish the job.

Meanwhile, the Nebraska has been playing a dangerous game of tag with the ghost ship and its confounding fog. It was now time to take control of the missiles and get out of the way before the fireworks engulfed the Nebraska as well. The Nebraska goes to flank speed moments before a hail of missiles enter the eerie white fog that surrounds the ghost ship. No explosions are seen, but the cloud vanishes. There is no wreckage in the area. The radiation readings are almost off the chart, though. The missiles did explode. The Nebraska radios the mission accomplished code. The majority of the now reinforced MWC fleet arrives within minutes. The scans still reveal no wreckage. There is no fog, no ship, no debris. Task force commander plephart decides to take the fleet on through. The breakout was complete. It was now time to hunt down the fleeing GROSS command survey ship, the Doom.

Gerakken had been watching the events unfold around the Nebraska. He quickly flew back to the Doom when he spotted the MWC fleet making its move. Gerakken flew like there was no tomorrow back to the Doom. He knows that the Doom has surely detected the large fleet approaching it, but Gerakken carried vital information on how to defeat the MWC from a previous mission to MWC Command.

Arriving back at the Doom, Gerakken approaches from the starboard side. He gets a shock when he is in visual range. The Yor-based robots have showed remarkable intelligence and rebelliousness when they weren't being watched, for the entire starboard side did indeed have a base coat of blood red, but the overlay was a series of concentric white rings. The large red bullseye beckoned in the middle. The Doom was painted with a target on one side!

Um, what was the point of that story? Anyways fellow undead, who is going to play off in the ice hockey finals this year?

EEEVIIIL!!!!!!

Gerakken had "corrected" the flaw in his scraper/painter robots and had them redo the starboard side in the proper pattern. They would do as they were told when they were being watched, but turn your back and watch out! These were robots, supposedly dumb machines that could only complete programmed tasks and not droids, intelligent machines able to reprogram themselves. But the Yor are always different. Yor society is caste based and the machine that can upgrade itself gets the better jobs. Even those of the lowest caste have an innate mechanical cunning, an instinct to upgrade and therefore get ahead. Using Yor based technologies developed from captured Yor units was therefore inherently risky, not to mention using the actual captured Yor themselves, but the Spymaster was willing to take that chance.

Later, Gerakken is monitoring the channels when one of the Spymaster's converted Yor espionage droids, Shadow, intercepted information from the Euros stating that the Canadian Ghost Ship was drifting through their space and had wrecked a small ship of the Colonial Defense Armada. The MWC had hit the ship with a massive strike and nothing seems to kill the ghost ship. It just disappears until another day. So far, nothing real exciting here. But on the screen comes a picture of a large, gold ring: The sign of the Fellowship! It is a standard greeting message: "Welcome to Fellowship space."

"How did they get here so fast?", a growling voice of the boss came over the comm. Gerakken answered, "They teleported. We had best time our raids carefully while in Fellowship space. They can be real dangerous." The dread pirate continued, in a better mood, "Arg, ye matey, those sneaky mages! They got good booze. I'll enjoy raiding them again."

So comes a time when the Doom slows down and carefully picks its way through Fellowship space. The MWC fleet of missile cruisers is not far behind, but they will have to be also wary of the Fellowship. The laws of physics get twisted when the magi are around. Hopefully, it will take the Fellowship time to digest its newfound territory and the Doom will be able to sail through, all while taking some fine loot on the way. Also hopefully, the MWC will get caught in a quagmire in a place where their supreme missile technology is less effective.

A nice one, poet. When's that next reading? Oh dang, I will be out of town I must check on that battlestar we are acquiring from a fine chap named Adama now that he's made it to earth.

Espionage droid Fog urgently pages his master. "Spymaster, MWC Strategic Missile Command has authorized code OP-13. The plan is already in action. Strike package to arrive on target in less than an ten minutes." Gerakken stops dead in his tracks, "Are they mad? An Omega Plan? And isn't OP-13..." The droid interjected, "Yes, Spymaster. OP-13 is the code for a Drengin assault on Sol. The target is the Doom." Gerakken is still stunned, "Well, Drengin we are not, we just employ them from time to time and we are not even near Sol! It's madness, shear madness to rate us as that extreme of a threat! Thanks, Fog. I got work to do."

Gerakken keys the comm channel shipwide: "Battle Stations! All hands to battle stations! Incoming attack. Hyperspace projectile assault in less than 10 minutes!" The Spymaster hits the master power switch in the workshop to shut everything down instantly. He starts running to the battle communications center deep inside the Doom. Another voice on the loudspeaker: "MWS Tulsa sighted at extreme weapons range. Target not closing." Gerakken's mind raced as he sprinted down stairs. The Tulsa was mostly a recon vessel. It carried only one rack of relatively light anti-ship missiles for self defense. It was here to track the Doom ahead of the MWC Vanguard Fleet.

After two frenzied minutes, Gerakken was on station. It was as he feared. The Vanguard Fleet was just now coming onto long range scanners. The strike package would cripple the Doom and the rest of the missile fleet would try to finish us off. The speaker blared again: "Man overboard! Man overboard!" What? Someone was abandoning ship BEFORE the missiles struck? We'll have to deal with that later. Fall behind, get left behind was the modus operandi in space combat. More tense minutes passed, as interceptors were launched and turrets were scanning space, looking for the first missiles. Gerakken thought to himself, "We are in Fellowship space. They aren't going to like all this noise in their backyard." The command channels crackled with standard status reports and last second preperations. But it was almost time. "All ahead flank. Evasive action, evasive action!", came over the battle channel. Show time.

The battle communications center had arrays of cameras and sensors. The ouside cameras were picking up the interceptor craft vainly trying to destroy the missiles as they dropped into normal space to terminate their run. The Doom was executing a wildly rolling S-turn as the short range turrets opened up. More missiles down. The longer ranged big guns were of little use against targets this small, and would have required a more stable firing position to use anyway. Several near misses rocked the Doom, much like a submarine under depth charge attack. Suddenly, a huge explosion rocked the ship. "Hull breach on Deck H, hull breach on Deck H," came the automated damage control warning.

A quick glance at the master status display determined it was a hit to some cargo holds on the starboard side. Not a crippling hit, but no hit is a good one in a fight like this! The main volley was over. "Stop thrashin' about and turn this bucket of bolts around!", shouted the boss over the battle channel. The Doom stopped rolling and slowed down, deliberately coming about. "Mains online, all batteries ready," came over the channel. The Vanguard fleet was about to launch its deadly cargo, when the boss hollers over the channel, "Ramming speed! Prepare for point blank engagement. Boarding parties at the ready!"

The plan was for a quick and bloody battle inside the effective missile range of the Vanguard fleet. Meanwhile, in the so far brief confusion, Fellowship spies were watching from afar while other Fellowship operatives rescue the lost crewman.

Uhhh...spies? We're not spies...we are simply apple merchants from Rohan... yeah...that's the ticket!

Odd. Pontius thought, An apple merchant during the middle of strawberry season on Rohan. Perhaps Gerrakin was not aware of this. I better not tell gunner, he might give away that we know. Needless to say Pontius knew this Barry light would have to be watched, from the shadows. And Gunner would need backup on this one if things went awry. Trouble is, Pontius had to meet Adama to procure more firepower for the fleet. Nevertheless, he assigned Kit Warrier the task with a green light to kill Barry light if necessary.

Barry regretted buying this spy equipment from the scratch-and-dent sale at Sears. Now, who the heck did he assign my assasination to???

Suddenly, Barry got a comm message from the Social Coordinator, Mrs. Light. Wives have complete control over all social obligations, thought Barry.

"Dinner...now...in town!" was the message.

Well, at least it was going to be a decent meal tonight!
[Message Edited]

Kit regretted buying this communication equipment from the scratch-and-dent sale at Sears. Now, who the heck was he assigned to assassinate???

Suddenly, Kit got a comm message from the Social Coordinator, Mrs. Pilot. Wives have complete control over all social obligations, thought Kit.

"Dinner...now...onboard the ship!" was the message.

Well, at least it was going to be a decent meal tonight!
[Message Edited]

Confirm Kit... Confirm? Oh chitt Kit, now I'm gonna have to attend that dinner too.

Pontius then gave kit his orders in person.

Kit then thought. Dang!!! This is just a watch order. I dearly wanted to assassinate someone. Well maybe it will become necessary and I'll get to have some fun.

Pontius and his wife then left to rendevous with this Adama Character about a battlestar...Leaving Gerakkin and EBZ in charge of the doom with strict orders that if attacked with overwhelming force to get that ship outta there.

(note: credit for this concept and many of the following phrases belongs to the wild one)

Real pirate testimonial:

Yes, I can testify to the power of G.R.O.S.S. in my life. I was a lowly thief, devoid of all happiness and meaning, scrabbling for beer and drifting aimlessly in space. I mean, it was degrading, I took baths, but no one would go out with me...

Then I found Get Rid Of Slimy alienS! My eyes were opened to a new way of living. Now I drive the most famous ship in the Metaverse, the Survey Ship of Doom! I also get pirate clothes twice a week and never bathe... ever!

My self-esteem has risen and I am making new friends... and the chicks love pirates...

You too can be all that you can be - in G.R.O.S.S.!

Oh, and you get a cool eye patch too...

Pontius and the rest of the crew sneak up behind Kit with pails of water. Bwoooooooooosh Bwoooooosh Kit is soaked to the skin.

There is a shower around here ya know.

Happy Hour on the Survey Ship on Doom. Overlords drink free. Please feel free to join the crew (though if you wander out of the bar and meet a press gang you may not have a choice.) Today's Special: Torian Cabbage Soup.

'Wait hold it right there' cried the pirates. The promo had sounded good up till then.

CypherPax shrugged. 'Darn pixies changed the Arcean spirits I captured into produce. Gotta do something with it. Maybe if we get any new recruits they can round them up, I have an interesting recipe for Pixie Dust that I'd like to try.'

Cut to the chorus:
Yo, Ho! Yo, Ho! It's a pirate's life for me!

Pontius enters the room, Ashes to ashes, Pixies to Dust. Zooooorch. There, that's the last of em. I brought back Kentucky Fried Drengin... Dig in.

As the Doom was slowly coming around, some of the raiders were hatching a plan all their own. There was obviously going to be some boarding after the main guns fired, and the boarding party boat captains needed their orders. Gerakken heard the conspiracy unfold from his post deep in the battle communications room.

One voice that sounded like KitWarrior says, "So, are we going to board and scuttle the MWS Indiana, one of the MWC's most feared dreadnaughts?" Gerakken cut in, "May I suggest the MWS Tulsa, the battleship that lead a task force responsible for blockading a key sector of ours for a long time?" Another voice, sounding like CypherPax, stated, "No. Our target is the MWS Milwaukee." Gerakken jerks to attention in his seat, and slowly says, "The Milwaukee? Isn't that a fleet tender, a supply ship?" CypherPax answers back, "Yes, it is. We are going to board and capture that ship. It has the fleet's beer supply!" Gerakken mutters to himself, "It figures." He then keys the channel back on, stating: "But the boss is the one who gives the final orders on whether we fight or run, and which ships we deliberately board."

The Doom was finally in position. Most of the guns were ready, but there was still a throbbing, glowing display of energy building up in the Doom's ultimate weapon to date, the Super Space Distortion Cannon (SSDC). All spacers have heard the legends of this powerful weapon. A direct hit was almost certain to be lethal to even the larger ships. The huge nose mounted weapon finally fired, space seemed to warp and fold in slow motion like a blanket being flicked over a bed. The MWS Kansas and MWS Illinois, two powerful dreadnaughts directly in front of the Doom, had read the warning signs a few seconds beforehand and were already trying to move out of the way. The awesome wave literally tore most of their outer hulls off on one side of each ship. While badly damaged, they were still able to fight with some effectiveness. The slow firing SSDC would take time to recharge. Gerakken wondered what devious strategy his captain had in mind now that the battle was fully joined.

Ahhh I see you've taken over the writing mid battle. Teehee Full story tomorrow....

A short time before Post 96.

The Pirates of the southern Seas were no sooner getting used to their surroundings when still at the ice planet,

RED ALERT RED ALERT, COMBINED FLEET APPROACHING RING WORMS AND PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF MIDDLE AMERICA. THIS IS NO DRILL. ALL HANDS TO PRIMARY BATTLE STATIONS. ALL HANDS TO PRIMARY BATTLE STATIONS.

Pontius: Belay that. All hands to secondary battle stations as drilled.

Gerakkin: What?

Pontius: You'll see. See that red lever by the captain's chair, the one you so like when I'm gone? When I give the word, or if all hope seems lost, pull it. And get out of there.

Gerakkin: But sir Don't we need all bridge officers here?
Pontius: Just you see. We've a little surprise. Beam Red and Green Squadron's down please. And a couple of engineers. And that new junior helmsman We've been training who'd just itching for some bridge time Uh what's his name Darth Bob. Send EBZ down here too. The Southern Pirates will need an extra hand. Out.

Gerakkin did not yet see the plan, And he knew the main engines were still damaged from the last battle so the doom could not run this time. The Pirates seemed doomed. But Pontius had a reputation of having an ace buried up his sleve on more than one occasion, so maybe, just maybe.

Meanwhile down on the planet:

Ok Drop bear, Wombat come with me, Think we can get this precurser ship going? We'll need to to take some heat off the doom. Say, how are you two at flying tactical fighters.? If I'm right, you'll each be leading a squadron of them. The High fives of the new Southern Seas Pirates indeed showed they did know how to fly tactical fighters. Good. I think this is actually a Battlestar from long ago. The Long Lost Pegasus (Oh I know we're stealin from a tv show but we're pirates so what do you expect)

Hurley: I take it you can command the Southern fleet with EBZ's help.? I'm counting on you EBZ. Good. Hang back and protect this planet untill we get this crate off the ground.

Meanwhile, back at the doom. 50 Microns and closing sir, The Iowa, The Missouri, The Sammy Sosa, The Liberator. The Manifest Destiny. The Mao. The Lenin. The Stalin. It's the whole fleet sir, they've brought everything. There's too many of em sir. And that's just the mwc ships. Theres the ringwraith, the toilet ring, the bathtubring, the nosering, the Johnson ring, the belly button ring, the tongue ring, the ring around the collar, the ringworm....

The MWC and ring ships all pounded the Doom. But she was a tough old ship. Insert Gerrakin # 96 here. Finally with the engines down, The Death Ray Zorchers all but exausted, and out of missiles, the main weapon in need of a recharge, all hope seemed lost. Instead of boarding, the Pirates would be defending. Where is Pontius thought Gerakkin. Where?
__________
Ahh ahh ahh don't leave that TV, Not untill you've dialed 1.900. G.R.O.S.S. and signed up!!!! hehe Darn commercials.
_______

Meanwhile aboard the PRCA Liberator.

Plephart: Burn Doom Burn, Witness the final destruction of the Pirates. Now our Children can watch wholesome stuff again like the Waltons and Little house on the prairie and read their Red Books like they are supposed to. I just wish I could see Pontius's face in the doom right now.

:But Sir

Plephart: Shut up you fool, I don't want to miss another second.

:But sir, I really think you should see the battlestar closing on our flank

Over the com: Guess who Pajama boy!!!!!! Gunner Pull the Lever.

Plephart: You foool get us out of here. What are you waiting for? Hit the button. Now!!

But sir which button? I need an oral exam. Too late Plephart realized his navigator was none other than Teacher's Pet Clarett VI. "CURSE OHIO ST. Michigan would never turn out such a dolt," thought Plephart. Oh well, the rest of the ships will get em. What's one battlestar against the rest of the fleet.

But he was wrong. From behind the planet a rousing sound was heard over the com channels. "Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda"

Ray: It's our friends the Aussies, I've been making overatures to them with my D&D mmorpg. They are sure to wax these pirates continue the assault. Suddenly the flagship Ringwraith, which looks curiosly like a cylon base ship, is jolted by a wallop from a Fighter piloted by the Venerable Drop Bear. HAHAHAHAHHA MY Nemisis shall we dance? Whomp!!! again the Ringwraith is jolted. Take out the Turrets of all these ring ships on the right. Red Squad. Green Squad, You take the left. That last one in line will be Ray's ship. We'll be. going right for it Wombat.

Ray conjured up his best spell. But it had no effect. "Curses a spell dampening field." That's the work of Pontius!!! These aussies are getting help. No matter, these little ships can take our our point defenses, but we're still pounding em, continue the assault.


Well thought Gerakkin, All hope seems lost, We haven't the weapons for all these ships and we can't outrun em. Then there's the ringwraith, the ringworm, the toiletring, the bathtub ring, the Diamond Ring, the Ruby Ring, and all the other fellowship of the ring ships to worry about. So Gerakkin pulled the lever.

Suddenly a great shudder went through the ship as it broke apart into pieces. Oh no not another one of Pontius' schemes thought Gunner. Who needs the mwc, we'll tear apart ourselves

Is the doom doomed? Stay tuned. Same Pirate time, Same Pirate Channel.


[Message Edited]

Sounds like something out of a Dr. Seuss book... LOL

Cute story.

Sam I am. Sam I am. I do not like Green eggs and ham.

You're a poet, and didn't know it!

The epic battle: Part 2.

The Battle raged on, but suddenly everyone stopped to watch as the Doom seemingly was breaking up.

Meanwhile, aboard Plepharts lifepod

Plephart: Pontius may have got my ship, but at least I saw this.... Nooooo it couldn't be. NOOOOOOOOO!!!!

It was true. The Doom was indeed a transformer breaking down into several component and equally deadly parts shedding only the now useless main drive. The Fellowship and the mwc targeting her main drive had been a mistake. One by one each part took its form.

The Enterprise. The Defiant. A big Pyramid with a glyph on the side, A battlestar, the Galactica, The Horizen, The agamemnon, The Apollo, A saucer shaped ship. The vesubius. The Voyager, A couple Romulan ships, A couple klingon ships, Each with a member of G.R.O.S.S. commanding. I leave it to you to write your own stories of your own ships in battle with the MWC.

Plephart. My God!!! They've stolen and corrupted all my favorite TV shows and Movies. Curse these Pirates!!!
_________

Suddenly out of nowhere, Staffa arrived in his ship the Barry Bonds. You can guess which ship he went after. The Sammy Sosa fought valiently her bat shields swinging away at incoming projectiles and missing most, but more importantly not getting hit. The Barry Bonds was using its elbow Pad forward shield to deflect the Blows of the sosas projectile weapons An epic battle ensued. Suddenly
Staffa: Ramming Speed!!!
Bwoooosh, The Sammy Sosa split in two. Pieces of debree were strewn everywhere.
Staffa: CORKED!!! I KNEW IT!!!!!!

MEANWHILE. The Pegasus and Walzing matilda had been engaging the Rings in a battle of epic proportions.

Hurley: EBZ are you thinking what I'm thinking?
EBZ: Yes, lets ram this sucker right down their throats.
Hurley: Yeah see if they have the belly for it.
Both: All tubes at the ready. Pegasus, follow in right behind....

Pontius: Acknowledged. Transporters Lock in on the matilda's crew and prepare to beam them aboard.

FIRE!!!!! Babooom!!!! A blinding flash as the toilet ring and the Ring around the collar are both destroyed. The Matilda is taking damage.

Fire!!!!! Baboooom A blinding flash as the Ringworm and the Diamond Ring are both destroyed. The Matilda is taking heavy damage.

Fire!!!! Babooom, A blinding flash as the Bathtub ring and the Wedding ring are both destroyed.

Pontius: Transporter now!!!!!! Babooom!!! The Wedding Ring, the 9human rings, the 3 elven rings and the 6 dwarvenrings, along with the matilda are all destroyed. The remaining Ring ships bug out at this dramatic develepment.

Ray : Curse you drop bear. We'll be back.


Pontius: Oh and get that Ring shaped winecellar in tow. We might salvage some of her cargo. Looks like the rest of the gang has taken care of the mwc, They are bugging out. But oh they have left their freighters behind.

.

And so, the Glorius Pirates of the south seas, have come to the rescue of the mighty G.R.O.S.S. in its dark hour.

__________
The aftermath.

In the sickbay with Dr. Quinn. Hurley is getting his wounds attended. A good pirate.. Hmmm I don't know.
DR. Quinn: Here watch this. Haven't you seen the Princess Bride? Dread Pirate Roberts was a good pirate. And well, you can call me Buttercup.

Hurley: Upon second thought, I'm not that wounded. I love being a pirate, and you need to tend to all your patients.... as he backs out the door quickly.

Dr Quinn: Curses, I do have all these wounded. Say this one's kind of cute. Hmmmmmmm.


Meanwhile back at MWC headquarters
idle: Well gang all is not lost, we did manage to liberate some Dr. Quinn wholesome entertainment from the pirates ship in that bording raid. Lets watch and console ourselves with a sasparilla.

But unbeknown to them it was the new Dr. Quinn's porno tapes. It seems drop bear and his animal magnetism had really changed her.

OOOOOOH MY!!! WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT.
Surther: Ohhhhh Momma!!! come to Papa!!!!! I'm beginning to like these Pirates.
Kryo: Now this is the Dr. Quinn Episode I like!!!!!
Plephart: Surther!!!!! That's not wholesome!!!! HIDE THE KID'S EYES. HIDE THE KID'S EYE'S!!!!! Where's that red book? I'm gonna just keep these tapes for uh reviewing, make sure they are unwatchable.

Idle just slaps his forhead and sighs.

Welcome to first gang. Thanks to the Southern Pirates, our newest members. Feel free to add your battle stories. Or revise this one.