Xaltec

Xaltec

Joined Member # 305100
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A famous heart specialist doctor died and it's his funeral. A regular coffin was displayed in front of a huge heart. When the minister finished with the sermon and after everyone said their good-byes, the heart was opened, the coffin rolled inside, and the heart closed. Just at that moment one of the mourners started laughing. The guy next to him asked: "Why are you laughing?" "I was thinking about my own funeral" the man replied. "What's so funny about

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An 18 year-old girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for 2 months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you?" The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later a Ferrari stops in front of their house; a mature and distinguished man with gray hair and impeccably

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The priest and his brother are playing a round of golf. At the first green the brother misses a 3foot putt. "Dammit I missed!" He yells. The priest tuts and says "If you continue to curse like that, God will strike you down with a bolt of lightning!" Sure enough at the next hole the brother misses a 2foot putt. "Dammit I missed" He yells. And at that moment the clouds open and a bolt of lightning strikes the priest down.. "DAMMIT I MISSED!" Says God! <img src="http

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A couple of strangers were drinking at a cliffside bar overlooking the ocean. Both of them look a little drunk, when one says to the other: "Hey, look at the wind whipping up the side of that cliff. It moves pretty fast. I'll bet I could jump off of the ledge, catch the wind in my coat, and get lifted right back up to the bar!" "No way", says the other guy, "you'd fall to your death." "Well, I'm going to try it!", says the firs

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There once was a rich man who was near death. He was very grieved because he had worked so hard for his money and he wanted to take it with him to heaven. So he began to pray that he might be able to take some of his wealth with him. An angel hears his plea and appears to him. "Sorry, but you can't take your wealth with you." The man implores the angel to speak to God to see if He might bend the rules. The man continues to pray that his wealth could follow him.

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My name came around after a long stint in various chatrooms under several different names... "TextManiac" "One-Eighty" "TD (Twin Dragon)" Wanted to get a name and keep it! Was scratching around for days trying to think of one... Found it in the oddest place.... My old PC speakers... They where called Xaltec, can't remember the maker, but they wern't exactly top quality! That was three years ago and I'm still quite comfortable with Xaltec or Xal or Xally or just plain X <img src="http://i

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Little Johnny came home from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard. Rigormortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air. When his Dad came home Johnny said, "Dad our roosters dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Why is his legs sticking in the air?" His father thinking quickly said, "Son, that's so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven." "Gee Dad that's great," said little Johnny. A few da

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A Horoscope For The Workplace ASTROLOGY: tells us about you and your future simply by your birthday. The Chinese Zodiac uses the year of your birth. Demographics tell us what you like, dislike, whom you vote for, what you buy, and what you watch on TV. Well, the Corporate Zodiac goes a step further: simply by your job title, people will have you all figured out... MARKETING: You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid having to study in college, concentrat

1,171 Replies 208,902 Views